Love or Ownership
Category: Life

Found in a newsletter called “Inner Whispers”

JEALOUSY
“A process which occurs when one is actually dissatisfied with his or her own creations…”

I’m guessing this means that we push those who love us away and become angry with them when they turn to some one else to share emotions with. When we should be angry with ourselves, our ego steps in, to protect us and some how turns it around so that we can blame them and not ourself for our own hurt.

What has always bothered me was that jealousy is accepted as a normal emotion. It is even taught that if one does not become jealous then they aren’t in love.

True story: Back when I was in elementary school (during the 4th and fifth grade) I had a girl friend named Cheryl. I told her that she could have other boyfriends if she wanted to, it was ok with me, I didn’t think there was anything wrong with it, we should all be able to love each other. So she decided that I didn’t really love her, I was just saying that, because I wouldn’t be jealous if she had other boyfriends, so to get back at me she played a trick on me. She covered my eyes with her hands, said she had something to show me, walked me over to a sticker bush, told me to open my eyes and then pushed me into the sticker bush. My mother had to pull out the stickers with a pair of tweezers, both her and my older sister told me to brake up with her. But I didn’t, she apologized to me and I accepted it. She finally broke up with me and Debbie her friend brought me back the ring and said, “did you know she was seeing other boys.”

I won’t tell you that I am above any such emotion, it happens, I realize it and deal with it, just like anger or hatred. But jealousy is a little different you see, when you become jealous, nobody will tell you that you are wrong and they will always agree that the other person is either a jerk or a bitch.

Like I told a Lieutenant I worked for in the Navy, for some reason we mistaken mental sickness as love when we believe that a person has a right to be jealous because they love someone. If you love someone you will want them to be happy, even if that happiness comes from someone else. Love is not selfish. Somehow we have ownership and love mixed up with each other. You see a beautiful bird and you say I love that bird, so you capture it and put it in a cage. Do you really love it or do you just want to have it, there is a difference and the two are not the same. We will see a beautiful guy or gal and say we want them and we go about capturing them and the real prize is marriage, that’s when they are really ours, until the divorce that is.